I'll always love Ruthie O

Yesterday I said goodbye to my great grandmother and today she passed on. Oddly enough, I feel a sense of peace and tranquility knowing she is no longer suffering and that she's with her mom, sister and brothers, and my grandmom who all passed on before her. I have no tears, just smiles because I have a lifetime of fond memories.

Every year at Christmas time, she would load up her car and spend two weeks with us over the holidays. The house would be filled with the amazing smells of fresh pies baking, chicken frying, and ugh, the not so amazing smells of chitterlings, yuck!  She always slept with me when she visited and she always intercepted my attempts to sneak out of bed and check out my gifts early. I would get so angry when I heard my brothers creeping by en route to the Christmas tree. Who knew an 8 year old could be so bitter.

She was my first hairdresser. Whenever she came to visit she would whip out her oven and pressing combs and beat my unmanageable hair (kitchen included with nary a burn) into submission. My great grandmom had beautiful hair (down to her butt in her youth) that she would adeptly whip into a long braid or elegant French roll.

She was my own personal fresh air fund. She and my grandmother kept us at her house in Delaware for summers where we would see cows and horses and eat fresh fruit and vegetables and see fireflies and hear crickets. These were not things a girl from Atlantic City saw, heard, or ate on a regular basis.

But the greatest gift I got from my great grandmom was her example. She was a hard working, God fearing, strong, amazing woman. Elegant and graceful, wise and beautiful. If I could be half the woman she was, then I'd be doing well. She gave me my awesome grandmother who in turn gave me my awesome mom and aunt. All women I strive to be like everyday in one way or another.

Now that she's gone, as often is the case, there were so many things I needed her to show me and tell me that I never asked. How do you make bread and butter pickles and homemade applesauce? How did you feel when Barack Obama was elected? How do you think he's doing as our president? Are you proud of the adults we grew up to be? Do you really think I'm getting too heavy? (she commented on my weight a lot in her later years). What was it like for you growing up?  Did you experience a lot of racism?  Why didn't I inherit you and great-great grandmom's love of sports?  (Definitely would make me a better wife)

Our elders are such a vast wealth of history and we mustn't take for granted that they'll always be here with us.  God knows I treasured my Great grandmother for the person she was.  Her legacy will continue to live on through me, my brothers, my cousin, and my nephew.  While my heart breaks that I won't see the smile she always had for us (and Tartar) whenever we saw her, I take comfort in knowing that her pain is over and that one day, we'll see each other again.  I will love you always, Ruth Olivia!